Good morning Loves. To say that the past few years have been a little rough for me would be an understatement. I am not going to ruin your morning with all the details, but if you are an avid reader of My Diary then you know what I’m talking about. If you are new here – then welcome – I will give you the condensed version of my life over the last few years: It all started with the market crash when I lost half my income and ended up $50k in debt, then my best friend passed away very suddenly, I was physically attacked by my Dad’s girlfriend on my 30th birthday and to make a bad situation even worse my Dad defends her and is still with her today.
The emotions of depression
So to say that I have not been super cheery and high on life would be a fair statement. Now that I am 33 years old I am starting to realize that life is too short to let other people ruin it for you. Yes of course being in debt was so stressful that it made me physically sick, yes I still miss my best friend every single day and yes I wish my Dad didn’t live with a total psycho – but my life is what it is and I’m trying to deal with it.
Both my grandmother and my father suffer from depression, so I wish that I could just say sadness runs in my family but that seems like a cop out. I wanted to be better than my sadness. I decided that everyone has crap in their life that they have to deal with – my problems were not who I was, they were just what I had to deal with. I decided to stop ignoring the sadness, stop letting it consume me and start dealing with everything that was wrong in my life.
Hiding it only makes it worse
I tried to hide my sadness because the last thing in the world that I wanted was to talk about it. I tried therapy, but it didn’t work for me. Talking to a stranger in an uncomfortable office just wasn’t my thing. I wanted to get better, but I had to do it on my own terms.
Now that I am overcoming my sleepless nights, anger filled days and hermit-like behaviour I want to talk about it to help other people going through the same situation. I want people to know that depression is normal because sometimes we just have to face situations that we just aren’t mentally, physically and emotionally prepared to deal with.
You are better than your depression
Being sad is sometimes a part of life and you aren’t weird if you aren’t happy all the time. The key is to deal with the emotions and get better. You don’t have to be singing and skipping all the time, you should just love your life enough to get out of bed every morning.